David's Sermons

I've been reading a book recently, and one of the themes of the book is silence. It's not a Christian book, but I was interested in what the Bible has to say about silence. Just today I read a quote by a Greek philosopher: I have often regretted my words, but never my silence. Now I wouldn't go as far as saying that silence is always a good thing, but there are enough warnings in the Bible about our speech, and the damage it can do, that perhaps it is often the preferred option.

In the company of someone who is suffering

Job 2 v 11-13

Now when Job's three friends heard of all this evil that was come upon him, they came every one from his own place; Eliphaz the Temanite, and Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite: for they had made an appointment together to come to mourn with him and to comfort him.
And when they lifted up their eyes afar off, and knew him not, they lifted up their voice, and wept; and they rent every one his mantle, and sprinkled dust upon their heads toward heaven.
So they sat down with him upon the ground seven days and seven nights, and none spake a word unto him: for they saw that his grief was very great.

It can be hard to know what to say to someone who is suffering, or who is mourning. If we try and give advice it can seem inappropriate, or shallow. Being sympathetic may help, but finding the right words is difficult, and we may feel unqualified if we have not suffered in the same way.

Job's friends didn't try and sympathise with him, advise him or encourage him (at least not at first). Instead they simply sat with him in silence, saying nothing for 7 days. In fact, it was when they eventually started talking that the problems started.

So, quite often our silent presence is the best we can offer a person who is suffering. In our trials we sometimes don't want to talk to others, but it is comforting to know there is someone near who is ready to help, and to listen, when we need them.

When we are tempted to criticise others

James 4 v 11

Speak not evil one of another, brethren...

How often do we criticise others? How often do we praise others? I have to say in my case the former is greater than the latter. How often do we compare ourselves to others, and think that we wouldn't make their mistakes, or we would do things differently. In these cases we need to learn to be silent, to hold our tongues. This may seem impossible, and indeed James says that noone can tame the tongue, but with God's help we can be quiet when our tongues are desperate to speak a scathing word.

That doesn't mean we should ignore sin. If we see a brother or sister sinning, it is our duty to go to them, but to approach them in love, with an attitude of humility, knowing that we are equally liable to sin. We should approach them with the aim of restoration, not of revealing them to ridicule.

At all other times, we should refrain from criticism and correction. I shudder to think of the number of times I have corrected someone with perfect conviction that I am right, only to be proved wrong. Silence, again, is often the better option.

When we are accused

Isaiah 53 v 7

He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth: he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth.

One of the hardest times to be silent is hen we are accused. We want to deny all charges against us. If we know something is true, we want to explain why we did it, or make excuses. If we can't escape the fact that we were wrong, we try and point out the greater wrongs of our accuser.

Christ was accused of many things, all of them wrongly. He had done no wrong, and had the power to protect himself. Yet, when he was accused, he said nothing. He opened not his mouth. He thought nothing of himself and acted only in love for those who put him in that position: you and I.

The difference between you and I and Jesus, is that many of the accusations made against us will be true.

1 Peter 4 v 14-16

If ye be reproached for the name of Christ, happy are ye; for the spirit of glory and of God resteth upon you: on their part he is evil spoken of, but on your part he is glorified.
But let none of you suffer as a murderer, or as a thief, or as an evildoer, or as a busybody in other men's matters.
Yet if any man suffer as a Christian, let him not be ashamed; but let him glorify God on this behalf.

What should we do when we are accused? We must examine the case against us. If we are being accused correctly, then we have something in our lives which needs sorted, and we must pay attention to that rather than protesting our innocence. If we are wrongly accused, or as Peter says we are accused for Christ's sake, then silence is the answer. It is by no means the easiest answer, but it is the correct thing.

When we are before God

Habakkuk 2 v 20

But the LORD is in his holy temple: let all the earth keep silence before him.

Psalm 46 v 10

Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.

Lastly, we should learn to be silent before God. Again, this isn't easy, as our minds are filled with distractions, or external noise takes our attentions away, but the discipline of silence before the Lord is one which he commands us to embrace, and one which is ultimately very rewarding. In a relationship it is important that we listen as well as talk, and with the Lord, it is important that we take time to listen for what he has to say, as well just spending time together in silence.

Summary

We have thought of several ways in which silence is an important thing to learn: when comforting the suffering person, when tempted to criticise, when accused by others and when we are before the Lord. There is of course a time for speaking as well as a time for silence. We don't usually have any trouble with that, though.